238- The Joy of the Groom and Bride

We have gathered here to partake in the joy of the groom. A person must delight the groom, as our sages said, “He who enjoys a groom’s meal and does not delight him…” (Berachot 6b).

In the Seven Blessings [said at a wedding], we say, “Who delights a groom with the bride.” If the Creator delights the groom and the bride, we must also partake in the joy and delight the groom and the bride. Our sages said, “He who enjoys a groom’s meal and does not delight him,” meaning that they decreed to delight the groom.

About the bride, we say, “How does one dance before the bride? A beautiful and graceful bride” (Ketubot 16b).

We should understand why specifically dancing pertains to the bride, and in general, what is a dance. We see that in a dance, there are ups and downs and turns to the four corners of the world, but in the end, we remain standing on the ground.

The groom implies the Creator, as it is written, “On the day of his espousal and on the day of the merriment of his heart,” and as it is written, “And the Lord descended on the mount” which is a descent in degree.

A bride is called “the assembly of Israel.” During the wedding, which is an indication of the upper root, we should know that even if all four corners of the world want to push the whole of Israel, and even after all the descents, they will remain standing in their place.

This is why we say, “A beautiful and graceful bride,” since she remains in a state of beauty and not in a state of lowliness. We do not say as it is written, that now she is in exile, and we evoke the joy that will be at the end of correction.

The joy from the dance is like a sad tune that people enjoy. The tune depicts a collection of sufferings that have already passed, but now we enjoy the benefits we gained from the suffering. Likewise, the dance contains joy that after all the ups and downs they went through, they nonetheless remained standing firm in their place.

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We have gathered here in order to delight the groom and the bride, as it is written in the Seven Blessings, “Blessed are You, Lord, who delights a groom and a bride.” If we find that the Creator delights the groom and the bride, then we, too, must partake in this joy.

Concerning the groom, we find “He who enjoys a groom’s meal and does not delight him,” meaning he should delight the groom, but they did not say with what. Concerning the bride, we find, “Our sages said, ‘How does one dance before the bride?’” and also to say, “A beautiful and graceful bride,” like the House of Hillel, and not “A bride as she is.”

The thing is that a groom is the Creator, from the words “descended in degree,” as it is written, “And the Lord descended on the mount.” A bride is regarded as “the whole of Israel.” From the perspective of the Creator, there is no change at all, as it is written, “I the Lord do not change.” All the changes come only from the receivers. Hence, a bride implies the receivers, which are the whole of Israel, where there is the matter of ascents and descents, meaning the time of exile and the time of redemption.

We should say that the guidance of the Creator is in the manner of good and doing good: “Everything that the Merciful One does, He does for the best,” and “This too is for the best.” It follows that during the dance, when there are changes, we should say, “A beautiful and graceful bride.” This is after her end, meaning that by practicing the corporeal Mitzva [commandment], we evoke the root above, the unification of the end of correction, and in this we should delight.

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