The Light Is Inside Me, Not Outside

Question: Do I feel just my reaction to the Light and never the Light itself?

Dr. Laitman's Answer: That's right. "The Light" is my reaction to bestowal and I don't know where or from whom it comes from. The Light is what I feel within me; it is my desire to bestow, the impression inside my will to enjoy.

The same thing is true in our world: I don't know what causes my pleasure. I take a piece of cow, make a steak out of it, put it in my mouth, and enjoy it. Can you explain that? The cow is surprised, thinking: "I have half a ton of meat, so why don't I enjoy it?"

In other words, everything depends on the desire, not the fulfillment. The spiritual vessel is HaVaYaH (Yod, Hey, Vav, Hey) or desire, and the Light in it is designated by additional letters, meaning other desires. Yet, we use them to designate the Light, the desire. I never feel the "meat," but only my impressions of what I call "meat."

The Protective Shield Of Bina

The World of Atzilut is separated from the Worlds of BYA by a special screen called Parsa. This is not just the end of one world and the beginning of another, but a special shield that the World of Atzilut has from the lower worlds, separating them and not enabling them to connect.

The protective shield has the quality of Bina, the quality of bestowal, mercy. If anyone wishing to receive approaches this boundary from below, the sensation of this quality throws him back because he is an egoist.

This is how all the qualities of Bina operate (such as Noah's Ark, womb, city walls, and the letter Samech). They indicate what spirituality is, that it is "for the sake of bestowal." That's why a person who is an egoist runs away from it if he is not ready for it.